I was born on the 17th June 1976.
Going back to the time I was
self aware or to the effect that I can remember parts of my past when I was
a very young child. At this time I had my two nannies living with me, one
was my dad’s mother which though I cant remember
what she looked like only faint phantoms images of her. The other nanny was my mum’s mother which
I have more clear memory of. My dad’s mum died while I was at very young
age and my other nanny died sometime after. So experiences with
grandparents are very little if any at all. I got two sisters one name
Denise and the other Lesley. One memory I can remember was when I was at
nursery and just woken up by one of the nursery nurse which showed it was
snowing outside. Though I may have seen snow before then but it the only
memory I got of seeing snow and making a snowman with other kids. One
Christmas I remember when my dad came into my room to show me something
under my pillow. It was one of those stocking packs with bars of chocolate
in.
i can
remember we had a dog called rover which used to catch mice and rats. He
was a very nice collie dog and used to go into the field with him at the
back of our garden. One day rover was out too long so my parents in the
field to get him. My dad took him to the vets but had to put him down due
to rickets in back legs and maggots eating him alive. It was a very sad
time especially when I saw my dad crying which in turn made me cry.
I went to grange park school
at the age of five which I quite enjoyed it there. Some kids played while
some practiced the alphabet and writing their own name and some kids did a
creativity activity. It was all rotational as all kids got a turn at every
thing. At age six I was in a school and my uncle Dave came with my mum to
pick me up. I did not know at the
time why they came early but was told later that my dad died of a heart
attack. I quite liked my dad and I used to ask him loads of questions. Me and my sisters never went to the funeral as mum
thought it best not to take us. With my dad gone My
mum had to raise me and my two sisters alone. She only had Uncle Dave and
my dad’s brothers Robert, Gordon and Norman.
Robert was helpful for a time
as he made a side door for the alley but due to mental problems my mum had
to bar him from the house. My uncle Gordon also had mental illness but was
not as dangerous as Robert. He used to come and baby sits us on Wednesdays
and Saturdays. He never asked for money from it just packet of fags and a
bottle of cream soda. We used to have him round at Christmas to join us for
Christmas dinner and he used to bring his flat mate with him.
my mum took me round to two new schools and asked me
which one I liked. I chose meadow school as my mum liked it and I did not
care which one I go to.
At first I was nervous going
to a new school but soon got used to it. I had one thing to help me. I had
a friend there who also went to Grange
Park. Though I never made many friends it was still good.
We had more work at this school and worked differently to Grange
Park. My individuality came through as I trying to find a
friend to hang around with was very difficult. I began to entertain my self
with my imagination and creativity.
I used to create my self as a
superhero portraying myself as finicky boy which was derived from what my
mum saying that I was very finicky. Look back at that finicky boy never use
his powers if any and had an enemy called strong boy. The funny thing I
remember that strong boy looked like me though was my enemy. Strong boy
wanted to rule the world by strength where as finicky boy used his brain
and ingenuity.
That lasted right up until I
was in senior class, then I went and played football with other pupils.
During the time at that school I moved up from class 1 to class 3 which at
that time I felt pleased with myself.
At the age of thirteen I baby
sat my sisters on Wednesdays while uncle Gordon
baby sat on Saturdays. This one Christmas we had that year was awful as my
day mum went to pick him up but came back telling me and my two sisters
that he killed himself by jumping out of the window. That really spoiled
our Christmas that year and Christmas was never the same.
At senior class I went to STC
(special technical centre) for six weeks. It is a centre that helps you get
used to in the working environment. They did a rotation every week so you
did not do the same thing every week. there was
woodwork, factory type work, cooking and computing. They also did
bricklaying. I went back to school after the six weeks was up. I got called
back to STC to do an exam on computing which I was the only person doing
the exam there. I got distinction in word-processing which is the highest
mark in the exam. My school was proud of me and so was my mum.
I left school at the age of
seventeen and went to college. I did extended education for a year then
went on to GNVQ Foundation in computers. I then moved up to B Tech
Foundation in computers. After that I went on jobseekers allowance for a
while and also done agency work doing dustmen and warehouse work.
I eventually found a permanent
work in a plastic company called jarzon plastics. It was a factory for precision
injection molding and I was a machine operator. I worked there for three
years before leaving and working in a hospital for sunlight linen services.
I worked as a linen distributor delivering linen to the wards and
departments. I met Kirk who was at the time the linen supervisor. He was a
Goth and portrayed himself as a vampire. He explained that he is in a clan
that he created and I became interested in the Gothic side of it. I joined
his clan and I became a Goth. Kirk left sunlight
after awhile and left Norman as the next supervisor. I still met up with Kirk for
clan meetings and events. Kirk eventually started working as a porter in
the hospital and became chargehand. I only worked for sunlight for about 9
months when I decided to get a job as a hospital porter. As I got to know
Kirk more I found that he was very self centered and only cared for himself. I found that I could not take what he said
literally. He seemed to me a person with conflicts in his mind.
Kirk did not have a good
attendance at work. He used to be off quite awhile and often phone in sick.
He eventually left porters and said he was moving to Scotland. Which I do not believe as he has
been seen around quite a few times.
Me and my fellow Goths created another clan of our own
which we kept the name from the old clan.
And to this day the clan is
still running.
I still work at Hillingdon
hospital as a porter but am now a chargehand.
During this time I have
searched my path and I have classed myself as a Satanist.
